Twas eons ago when I wrote my last blog here in Multiply. This blog wishes to tell you that my blogging self has moved to the following platforms:

isa sa pinakamasarap na kainin ang champorado.

unang una, sokolate siya. at mahal natin ang sokolate. masarap ang sokolate at hindi natin palalampasin ang sokolate. at its face, oke tayo sa sokolate, at saka na lang natin poproblemahin ang weight gained at calories - pag ubos na.

pangalawa, at ito ay importante: ang champorado ay masarap MAINIT MAN O MALAMIG. kapag malamig ang panahon, masarap ang mainit na champorado. at kapag mainit naman e masarap ang malamig na champorado. hindi siya namimili ng panahon kung kailan siya magiging masarap. ganun din dapat tayo. hindi namimili ng panahon kung kailan masarap pakisamahan. hindi ko sinasabing maging flexible to the point na wala ka nang buhay, pero maging mahusay tayo sa pakikisama natin sa ibang tao. kasi nga no man is an island. hindi mo talaga mapplease ang lahat ng tao, pero kung alam mong wala kang ginagawang mali, go lang. be sensitive lang sa needs ng iba. alamin mo kung kailan ka dapat mainit, kung kailan ka dapat malamig. parang champorado lang.

pangatlo, kahit lagyan mo ng gatas ang champorado e hindi tuluyang magbabago ang kulay niya. mamumuti siya, oo, pero kulay cocoa pa rin siya. sasarap siya nang hindi mo makikitang nagbago siya enough para hindi mo madistinguish na champorado siya. kulay sokolate pa rin. ganun din dapat tayo bilang tao. marami tayong nakakasalamuha araw araw pero hindi dapat nila ma-sway tayo basta basta. kahit anong sabihin sa iyo ng tao, dapat alam mo kung saan ka lulugar. hindi dapat bastabasta maimpluwensiyahan ng iba ang mga desisyon natin nang hindi natin mismo sinasala yung sinasabi nila. ang naniniwala sa sabi-sabi, walang bait sa sarili.

masarap talaga ang champorado. at may mga itinuturo pang lessons. kain!

God has a knack with water. And the Bible is explicit with His fondness of water. :)

i googled up my name and i found my oldest existing blog to date: http://benj.blogdrive.com

All this make-up makes me sneeze. This is what I call whitewashing, literally. The mirror shows a face white all over, fake curly hair that is terribly itchy and a nose that resembles my manager's stressball. Did they really wash these polka dot clothes? I can smell the juice that pesky kid poured on me after asking her to be my assistant. I swear I won't accept any parties from that place anymore. You don't know anymore how parents raise up their kids nowadays.

This is a good business I'm in. I mean, everyday, some kid's got to celebrate his birthday. And they need somebody like me to make 'em laugh. Easy money. Just do the same routine for a month and then modify some jokes, modify some puppet dialogues (actually they're monologues) and you've got money to sustain you. The job gets harder though, by the day. Those who came before me said kids nowadays are harder to deal with. Back then, stories were enough, balloons and candies made their day. Now you have to incorporate their favorite cartoon characters, get lines from the feel good movies and make a lot of magic.

But it's an unfair job. At the end of the day, who makes ME laugh? I’ve got an insecure girlfriend mainly because her boyfriend's a clown. My sister needs to enroll. After washing all the white stuff off, I don't deal with kids anymore. I deal with life. I deal with the harsh reality. I deal with the drag. Then what?

Every workday is a happy day. Happy because I get to make people laugh. But at the end of the day, it's just something to get me by this emptiness. I need something to make it last. I need something that stays.

Enough of this. I still have to put on my fake smile and make this party a happier place.

At least, for now.

narealize ko na talaga kung gaano ko kailangan si Lord. at kung gaano ko ka-kailangang maintindihan ang definition ng salitang grace.

This is a song by Jonathan Foreman, lead singer of the now indie band, Switchfoot.

God hates pretension. He hates show. He hates those who do things to impress people and not Him.

I hate all your show and pretense
The hypocrisy of your praise
The hypocrisy of your festivals
I hate all your show
Away with your noisy worship
Away with your noisy hymns
I stomp on my ears when you're singing 'em
I hate all your show

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show

Your eyes are closed when you're praying
You sing right along with the band
You shine up your shoes for services
There's blood on your hands
You turned your back on the homeless
And the ones that don't fit in your plan
Quit playing religion games
There's blood on your hands

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show
I hate all your show

Let's argue this out
If your sins are blood red
Let's argue this out
You'll be one of the clouds
Let's argue this out
Quit fooling around
Give love to the ones who can't love at all
Give hope to the ones who got no hope at all
Stand up for the ones who can't stand at all, all
I hate all your show
I hate all your show
I hate all your show
I hate all your show

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show
I hate all your show

this week, i will not do any show. it's Him or nothing.

ANNOUNCEMENT:

never again will i let myself be barred by the restricted internet connection of the College from blogging whenever i'm itching to do the same.

because i will blog AT HOME.

I think this is gonna be a good exercise. Monday night-Tuesday morning blogging. Emptying up and prepping for a whole new week of case law. :)) ---> (NEW)

Istartblogginghere:

this is so wonderful. little by little, i am enjoying this new horizon that God has given me. new people, new hurdles and new experiences. my Malcolm Adventure is turning out to be a wonderful experience. while i still have many encounters of the unpleasant kind, i have come to realize that they're part of the path i chose to tread. and to think i'm never trekking alone is a beautiful relief.

and because of that, i am getting fat. yes. physically. my belly's bothering me now but not to the point of becoming a contender for the Biggest Loser - that is if they'll have something like that on this side of the world. i've started to eat a lot of carbs and that is not good. enough of this. the next time i blog about my belly, i'll be proud enough to post a pic of it here. :))

next point. i am dyslexic on the keyboard. you'd give up counting the number of times i've hit on the backspace key because i totally pput lettres in disarary. maybe i'm really not used to typing. taking down notes in your laptop is very hard. to illustrate, i will type a sentence three times, without giving in to the temptation of erasing, word processor style.

this is a senticen that i want to use in illutsrating my typing prowess.
this is a sentence that i wiant to use in illustrating my typing pworewss
this is a sentence that i want to use in illustrating my typing porowess

talk about typing prowess. :))

there are some other things i want to blog. but 6 cases are in line, waiting for me to caress my stabilo on them.

lytbearer out. ---> (NEW)

ay pumanaw na. at ililibing na mamaya.

ito ang una kong blog entry sa blog na ito na tagalog. at walang relevance iyon sa sasabihin ko.

noong namatay ang lolo ko, hindi lumuha ang tatay ko. sinabi niya sa tita ko na huwag umiyak. hindi sa hindi siya nalulungkot sa pagkamatay ng lolo ko. kundi dahil nagawa na niya ang lahat at naipakita na niya ang sapat at lahat ng pagmamahal na kaya niyang ibigay sa lolo ko. oras na ng lolo ko at tinanggap iyon ng buong puso ng tatay ko. nakakalungkot, oo, ngunit walang nakitang dahilan ang tatay ko para lumuha dahil ang mga lumuluha raw ay mga taong hindi lubos na nagpakita ng kanilang pag-ibig sa taong namatay. hindi mo nga naman talaga din kasi malalaman ang halaga ng isang bagay hangga't wala na ito.

pero ibig ba sabihin noon ay may dahilan ka na para hindi magmahal ng lubos?

yun ang punto ng tatay ko. sa hangganan ng kakayahan niya ay naibigay na niya ang lahat ng kailangan upang maipakita na mahal niya ang lolo ko. noong malakas pa si lolo, inuumaga sila ng kwentuhan at iyon ang gusto ng lahat ng tao. na merong taong nagbubuhos ng oras sa kanila. noong nagkasakit ang lolo, pabalik-balik ang tatay ko at ang pamilya namin sa batangas upang tingnan ang kalagayan niya. noong malubha na ang sakit niya, andun pa rin ang tatay ko. hindi siya nagkulang sa payo at nakita ko iyon.

pero ang entry na ito ay hindi tungkol sa drama na dinaanan ng pamilya namin. ito ay tungkol sa pagpapakita na mahal mo ang isang tao ngayon pa lamang. ngayon. itong sandali na ito na binabasa mo. siguradong may mga taong mahal mo ngunit hindi mo mapatunayan dahil sa mga dahilang mahirap talagang ipaliwanag. may kanta ang bandang Beatles na hanggang ngayon ay akma sa kalidad ng pagwawalang bahala ng lipunang ito.

What the world needs now is love, sweet love.

tulad ng maraming taong nagsasabi, mahirap kalimutan si Presidente Tita Cory. isa na siyang dambana na hindi maiiwasang mapansin sa lahat ng taong mangangahas ng sundan o gayahin ang mga ginawa niya noon.

pero hindi lahat ng tao ay si Presidente Tita Cory. tungkulin natin na iparamdam sa bawat isa ang ating pagmamahal. at huwag nating kaligtaan kung saan...hindi, kung Kanino nanggagaling ang pagibig. una tayong inibig ng Panginoon. umibig tayo tulad ng pag-ibig Niya. walang kundisyon, walang kupas, walang pagaatubili.

what follows is a beautiful song of declaration. while I've heard about it, I just knew how the song was to be sung when I searched it up in YouTube. Thank God for YouTube.

I Have Decided To Follow Jesus by S. Sundar Singh.

I have decided to follow Jesus;
I have decided to follow Jesus;
I have decided to follow Jesus;
No turning back, no turning back.

Though I may wonder, I still will follow;
Though I may wonder, I still will follow;
Though I may wonder, I still will follow;
No turning back, no turning back.

The world behind me, the cross before me;
The world behind me, the cross before me;
The world behind me, the cross before me;
No turning back, no turning back.

Though none go with me, still I will follow;
Though none go with me, still I will follow;
Though none go with me, still I will follow;
No turning back, no turning back.

I have decided to follow Jesus;
I have decided to follow Jesus;
I have decided to follow Jesus;
No turning back, no turning back.

it's the heart of the song that moves me. I want this song to really be the song that my life declares even without me saying it. There is always the cost of following Jesus. But I want to become like the Apostle Paul, who took everything as rubbish compared to knowing Jesus. I want to experience that AND MORE. Struggles have been in front of me. But now, I will leave them behind. It's a weird feeling, since you've done everything almost routinary. But there will be a point where you decide. A point where you will choose. And I choose Christ. I will let go of the things that have never been pleasing to Him.

I have made mistakes in the past. I admit it. And I lay them down before Him.

Nails do leave holes, but Jesus' nails will always remind me that He took the holes that were supposedly for me.

It will be hard. Nobody wants to die to what he has been living with and living for.
But today we mark a line. A clear line. No turning back.

NO TURNING BACK.

it's the most beautiful thing to do when you know you can't do anything anymore.

you give up not just because you're all out of options but because you're learning how to trust.

surrendering is a trust.

and I know, oh what blessed assurance, that the One i trust, the One I surrender to, makes it worth it all.

yes, He is worth it all.

Two weeks have passed since Law School started. That is significant, especially if you're counting the days until it's the semestral break. Also, you can be proud of the days you've made it out alive. It works proactively and retroactively I guess.

In an earlier blog entry in Multiply, I shared a fact that found evidence in my life. The farther I am from God's Word (meaning the more I forget to read the Word), the nearer I am from doing something wrong or displeasing in His eyes. The two weeks have been no exception. Given the demand of the cases for reading and digesting, I came to realize that I wasn't able to follow my Bible plan anymore. I always keep telling myself that it's not about being legalistic, but I want to have read a Bible chapter or two for any given day for the purpose of getting nearer to God and farther from sin. But sadly, I have always been catching up on my Bible plan and never reading the right passage for that exact day.

While God never asked us to read His words everyday, He did tell us TO MEDITATE on them day and night. Again, I believe I have partly failed on this aspect too. My mind has been preoccupied by the cases that were due for reading and understanding.

But He loves me, overlooking my petty thoughts of incapacity and insufficiency.
And He reminds me over and over that:

1) Excellence is something God can be proud for us of.
- To become excellent for Him is to show that I am using the talents He has given me to become the best person that He wants me to be. And since nothing ever comes without a price, I have to be willing to pay them if I really aim to give Him the glory for all these things. ALL THIS came from Him, to begin with.

2) I can still find Him in Law School. In fact, He was the source of the first rule. Therefore, Law and everything that comes with it, is under His jurisdiction.
- The Lord knows the law. He made it. Like other creation, it also reflects His fullness and character. And He proved that to me when I read Leviticus. For example, the innocence of a person of having done an act against Him or His ordinances does not excuse the said person from sinning and therefore must offer the required animals for restitution. That principle is in the Civil Code too! Ignorance of the law excuses no one from compliance herewith. The Spanish Civil Code framers owe it to Daddy!

3) His power works best in my weakness.
- And all I need to do is to cast to Him my burdens because He is more than willing to give a yoke that is light.
Yes, I sing the Psalty Song once more:
I cast all my cares upon You/I lay all of my burdens down at Your feet./
And every time I don't know what to do, I will cast all my cares upon You.//

So there. I ask that if you ever are, by chance, reading this, say a little prayer for me. That Daddy may continue to sustain me and strengthen me. All this came from Him and all this is for Him.

Gloria in excelsis Deo indeed. :)

this entry was supposed to be a WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA entry because of the start of my Malcolm Adventures. while i was typing Blogger's url, there was another blog that caught my eye.

http://www.garylphillips.blogspot.com/

i was about to rant how hard (and that's still an understatement) this new adventure is until i saw that blog. the page title is a beautiful hymn that i've learned not so long ago. and the blog is about somebody going through neurolymphomatosis. i looked up for the definition of the said illness but sadly i didn't know how to comprehend the medical terms. all i know is that it's something serious. and life threatening.

but what a declaration from the blog's author. IT IS WELL WITH MY SOUL! the author who faces all these difficult situations has decided to really trust God.

and to think i was starting to write a rant post. sorry Lord, i will trust in You.

even in Law School, i will trust in YOU. \m/

"We'd never know what's wrong without the pain--
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."
-from "All At Once" by The Fray.

it is always hard to do the right thing. because we as humans are wired to do everything that makes us happy. we love to define events, things and yes, even people, by our own standards. we approve of someone and we disapprove of another. we are born egocentric. and even when humbling situations face us, we try our best not to lose face. we try to be brave and make everything seem okay, at least when people look at us. when we've lost all our aces, we try to show our joker cards. we still smile. but even Chaplin said that he loved the rain because when he's under the rain, nobody would notice him crying.

grace is something we all need. men can dispense some, but imperfectly. for the past few weeks, i have tried dispensing every ounce of grace. and of course, i failed. i tried so hard to forgive, to love and to extend patience by all humanly possible means. but i failed. it's either i still haven't tried hard enough or people just have too high ethical standards that even i haven't heard of.

but God begins the change when you're too deep beyond rescue. God makes it a point that we get into a situation where we lose our pleasures, we take in so much pain and leave what is marked 'comfortable'. He brings us to a place where we cannot help but look up to Him and ask for help, smashing the idol of pride for all its worth. His chastise straightens us up. when all the grace and patience i can muster dried up, His water-into-wine power came in and moved.

what are the costs of following Him?

1. no comfort.
2. He and His work is of top priority
3. there is no turning back.
   

yes, we will make wrong turns. we will regret things that cannot be undone. God will allow us to experience enough pitfalls to release us from our kingdoms of comfort and welcome us into the reality of His Kingdom of Light. it is the art of letting go that makes it easier to trust Him. He has made me understand that leading is never easy. it is NEVER easy.

surrender is the best cure for pride.

all my life i have loved rain. i still go and play outside on rainy days. rain has its way of making me feel that i'm free to do anything. i'm nothing like Karen Carpenter. rainy days don't get me down, they lift me up.

but at this point in my life, i'm beginning to love the dark rain clouds. rain clouds tell me that rains are coming. i don't know how hard the rains might fall, but there'll be rain. and that excites me.

rain clouds tell me that everything around me will change. the sun's rays will be replaced by an unwelcomed darkness. leaves will start to get insecure with the winds against them. the parched grounds will thirst no more.

i see rain clouds right now. i see intimidation and seemingly lost relationships. but LIFE MUST GO ON. if something should hamper me in this already slow but steady walk, i'd gladly let it go. maybe i don't need it now. maybe i don't need it at all.

the rain must fall. i know that. but i shall soar over it.
i may get wet in the process, but i will still be standing.

the Lord has to make me swallow bitter vegetables first before He gives me the dessert.

Once in my Multiply blog i wrote about a vandal on a wall somewhere in UP.

it said:
TANGA TAYONG LAHAT.

One of the comments it received was that if we really come to think of it, we tend to change the form of profane words to make them 'less' profane.

Examples: tangeks for tanga.
effin' for fucking.

Last night, I read about how Christians fail to reach out to the world because of compromising. We try to make a bridge between heaven and hell; we think we'd be better off if we have in our lives some of the world and some of Jesus. That way we can live at peace, or so we think.

We forget that the battle is not in the flesh, but in the Spirit. Jesus doesn't want us to hate everyone and love Him. He wants us to love Him so that through us He can love everyone. He wants us to fully surrender everything to Him - every aspect of our lives - so that we can be effective in telling the world that He lives and that He is more than willing to forgive a million sins.

We should not compromise. In the spiritual realm, there are no grey areas.

in lieu of starting anew, all my past blog entries in this blog have been deleted.

if you want to read them, proceed to my multiply website by clicking multiply at the header

Thank You.


PostScript:
Now that I'm handling three blogs (multiply, dbtreader and this)
please do not expect too much entries.

i loved Xanga first.
then i loved Blogger.
after that, i loved Multiply.
Plurk killed the blogger in me.
then Multiply won my heart again.

we start anew, Blogger. we start anew.

Psalm 55:22 - Give your burdens to the Lord,
      and he will take care of you.
      He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.

Jeremiah 33:3 - 'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.'

would you just look at those verses. notice the way they start. the verbs got no adverbs with them. and in case you forgot what adverbs are, they are verb modifiers. words like 'closely' for the verb 'look', 'slowly'  for the word 'walk' and etc.

going back to our verses, we can see that the verbs are plain verbs, nothing more, nothing less. and that speaks a lot already. see, you can give your burdens to the Lord without any reservations. you can call to Him and He will answer. no additional resumes or attached forms or whatever. just give them burdens. just call and He'll answer.

you don't have to reconsider what you've done in the past or what you did wrong. you don't have to wait for the perfect timing or carry all the burdens until you can't anymore. take note, this ain't New Testament material. this is the Old Testament! even before Jesus came, the Lord already invited His children to be perfectly honest and sincere with Him. He wants ia relationship that is personal to the core.

walanghiyahiya.

only Daddy can turn the black to white with scarlet. <3